Student got more when teachers teamed up

By Dan Maronez
Animal Handler Extraordinaire

Most people have uttered the phrase “I hate this teacher, they are out to get me!” This phrase was one uttered by Moriane Valley student Dan Maronez.  Maronez is an average student at our community college, but one with a troubling past.  Maronez made the mistake of taking Dr. Margaret “Maggie” Houlahan last semester for a basic Math course.

Houlahan is notorious for getting together with other faculty members and making her students lives a living hell.  She also has a low rating on Ratemyprofessor, she also is a total old hag and has no peppers, which indicate hotness rating, that go along with her name.

“It’s my job to set up a course syllabus, so what if I decide to pick on my students by getting together with their other teachers to make everything due on the same day,” said Houlahan.
Maronez was one of the unlucky students.  “I had a bio test, English paper, and a math quiz and test all on the same day.  The night before gave me virtually no time to play Xbox with my friends. It sucked,” said Maronez.

Larry McDonaldson, Maronez’s biology professor, commented, “I mean it isn’t that hard to be a student.  I think it builds character to have everything due on the same day.  We decided to make things challenging for our students, I mean we don’t really get together, its more like one of us makes the syllabus and sends it to the rest and we all copy the due dates and take turns making the due dates.”

Maronez had no choice but to drop Houlahan’s class. “Toward the end of my time in her class, she began singling me out in class like when I was texting my bros she would ask me if I was paying attention and to answer the question she asked without her repeating it, I mean who does that?,” said Maronez.

He has no other choice but to take the course over again in summer school, but luckily he still has enough credit hours to still be a full time student and stay on his parents insurance.  “Luckily I am taking gym courses right now,” said Maronez.  Maronez is attempting to get into the math class with that hot teacher that sort of looks like Jessica Alba, but with blonde hair and a nicer rack. “Man it would be so tight to be in her class, and she is single!,” said Maronez.

Maronez is glad to put this behind him, “I am glad the nightmare with Houlahan is over, I only hope that I can move on!” We at the Ice Cube wish Maronez the best of luck in the hot teacher’s class!